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  • Clara Mei

"Mom, I don't want to go to swim lessons!"

It's summer time- the sun is out, who wouldn't want to go to swim class?? My 11 year old...Now, I understand that he doesn't really get such a kick out of being splashed and made to put his face in the water--BUT, I also know how badly he wants to be a better swimmer and not have to hold his nose when he goes under water. So here I am trying to keep him focused on the bigger picture--persuading him to focus on what he WANTS to do, not on what he doesn't want to do. He doesn't want to have to get water up his nose, but he also wants to swim better, so I've tried to get him to focus on the latter...

Sometimes this encouragement works sometimes it doesn't. But having this conversation with him, makes me think about the numerous times I too, get stuck on the "do I have to's?!" when really I ultimately care more about the "this is what I want"...The reality is that often when planning, we just initially think about what we want--getting all geared up and motivated (which can be a feat in itself), but then when we actually have to do what we said we would, to get to where we want to--we forget to think about and plan for that "work" and that discomfort or bunch of energy that it will actually take to "get what we want". And by "get what we want"--I mean it's getting in that workout, that healthy meal prepared, that application done, those phone calls made---all those little things AND big things...It all takes work and intention--and we just need to be prepared for when the "do I have to's?" come into our minds and zap us of the focus on: "this is what I want!"

What do you want? Do you know what you want? Wherever you are on the spectrum of knowing and not knowing, and wherever you are on the spectrum of getting there, I can help! E-mail me at

Now, I must get back to my feelings of "do I have to?!" get my son to deal with his attitude about swim lessons. Because yes, I WANT him to get through this week of swim lessons and yes I know he WANTS to be a better swimmer!

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